Episode 080 – How Eliminating Choice Made Me Unstoppable

Subscribe on: APPLE PODCASTS | SPOTIFY | YOUTUBE | GOOGLE | RSS

Note: This blog post serves as an accompaniment to the corresponding podcast episode of A Changed Mind, where we’ll distill down the core ideas of this week’s theme, along with additional distinctions and insights. If you haven’t listened to the episode yet, you can go here to do so.  Enjoy.

You might be wondering why you’re not further ahead. Why more money, more success, or even more discipline feels just out of reach. It’s frustrating, isn’t it? The truth is, there’s one thing holding you back from all of it—whether it’s growing your business, excelling in your career, or simply becoming the person you know you’re capable of being.

That thing is a choice.

Yes, choice. The idea that you even have a choice is one of the most cunning, baffling, and powerful saboteurs in your life. When you can remove choice, when you see your situation for what it really is, you’ll start creating extraordinary results in every area of your life. Let me show you what I mean.

A Story About Purpose and Action

I want to start by telling you a story about one of my private clients. He came into my world under devastating circumstances—he had just lost his son, Marcus. In his grief, he sought out tools to find emotional stability and stumbled upon my work at a live event. That event became a turning point for him. Over the years, this work not only transformed his life but inspired him to become certified in the methodologies I teach.

Now, he’s using that knowledge to build a leadership development company with the potential to change lives on a massive scale. He wants a million people to know Marcus’s name. He told me, “I’m doing this work because I want to bring emotional intelligence and emotional resiliency to the environments where people work. I want to save others from the same tragic loss I experienced.”

But here’s the thing: despite his vision, despite his passion, he wasn’t taking consistent action. Why? Because he believed he had a choice.

The Dangerous Comfort of Choice

This client of mine had every reason to take action. He’s trained in cutting-edge technologies to help people regulate their nervous systems and build emotional resilience. He even started his business with almost no effort and generated a quarter of a million dollars. But he wasn’t executing the plan we’d created together.

He was comfortable. He had other businesses. He wasn’t facing immediate pressure to act.

But when we dug deeper, the pressure was there all along. He had told me, “A million people are going to know Marcus’s name.” And that’s when it clicked for him. He realized Marcus had already done his part. Marcus’s life and legacy had brought him to this work. Now, it was his turn to show up.

But until that moment, he had given himself too much choice—choice to procrastinate, to question himself, to wonder if he was good enough. Those choices were keeping him from becoming the man he was destined to be.

When I Had No Choice

I can relate to my client’s journey. There was a time in my life when I believed I had a choice. But that belief almost destroyed me.

Thirteen years ago, I woke up one day after blacking out, unable to remember what had happened the night before. That was my wake-up call. I had to face the terrifying truth: I was a drug addict, an alcoholic, and living a life that could only lead to destruction.

I didn’t have a choice. If I kept going the way I was, I would either drive drunk and kill someone, overdose, or end up in some other life-threatening situation. So I got help. I got into therapy. I started working a 12-step program. And every single day, I practiced surrender.

Looking back, I see now that eliminating choice was what saved me.

The Vision You’re Ignoring

Most of us have glimpses of the person we could become. We imagine greatness for ourselves—whether it’s building a business, improving our relationships, or creating a life of meaning and impact.

But here’s what happens: we shut it down.

“Oh, that’s not me.”
“I’m not good enough.”
“How could I possibly bridge the gap between where I am and where I want to be?”

Sound familiar?

The truth is, that vision you’ve had—it wasn’t just a daydream. It was given to you. I believe the vision I have for my life—a multi-billion-dollar transformational company, even the possibility of becoming president of the United States—was instilled in me by the same force that created the heavens and the earth.

What’s your vision? What greatness have you been imagining but ignoring?

What’s Really Holding You Back

Let me tell you what I see every day in the people I work with. It’s not a lack of resources, talent, or intelligence that holds us back. It’s the illusion of choice.

This illusion allows us to stay comfortable, even when comfort isn’t serving us. It keeps us stuck in procrastination, self-doubt, and fear. And worst of all, it prevents us from seeing the truth of our situation:

You don’t actually have a choice.

If you want to honor the vision that’s been placed inside you, if you want to become the person you’re destined to be, you must eliminate the belief that staying where you are is an option.

The Role of Something Greater

Now, you might be wondering, “If I don’t have a choice, how do I move forward when things feel impossible?”

Here’s what I’ve learned: achieving greatness isn’t something you do alone.

When I look back on the things I’m most proud of, I see how little of it was actually “me.” Take this blog, for example. Sure, I’m writing the words. But I couldn’t have done it if someone hadn’t invented the internet, or if platforms like Apple and Spotify didn’t exist. Even the ideas I’m sharing—they aren’t really mine. They’re thoughts that came to me from something greater.

Call it God, the universe, or whatever you want. The point is, there’s a force at work in your life that’s bigger than you. And when you align with it, doors open in ways you can’t explain.

How to Eliminate Choice

So, how do you do this? How do you eliminate the choices that are holding you back?

First, you need leverage. For my client, it was Marcus’s legacy. For me, it was the undeniable truth that my addictions would kill me if I didn’t change.

What’s your leverage? Maybe it’s your family, your health, or the vision you’ve been given. Maybe it’s the people you’re meant to serve, the lives you’re meant to impact. Whatever it is, find it.

Second, surrender your plan to something greater. Every morning, I say, “God, I lay my life at your feet. Do with me and through me as you will.” It’s a practice—a daily reminder that I’m not in this alone.

Finally, take consistent action. This isn’t about grinding yourself into the ground. It’s about showing up, even when it’s uncomfortable, and trusting that the next step will reveal itself.

The Life Waiting For You

Imagine what your life could look like if you gave up the illusion of choice.

You’d stop procrastinating. You’d let go of self-doubt. You’d step into your full potential, not because you’re forcing it, but because you see the truth: you have no choice but to become the person you’re meant to be.

This isn’t just about you. When you step into your greatness, you create a ripple effect. You inspire others. You change lives.

So, what will it be? Will you keep holding onto the belief that you have a choice? Or will you finally let it go and become the person you know you’re destined to be? You already have everything you need. Now it’s time to take the next step.