Episode 092 – This One Formula Allowed Me To Completely Hack My Reality

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Note: This blog post serves as an accompaniment to the corresponding podcast episode of A Changed Mind, where we’ll distill down the core ideas of this week’s theme, along with additional distinctions and insights. If you haven’t listened to the episode yet, you can go here to do so.  Enjoy.

Most people feel stuck in some area of their lives. Maybe it’s their finances, health, career, or relationships. They’re trapped in a matrix of their own reality, repeating the same day over and over again. It’s like getting a new job but feeling the same dissatisfaction. Or finding a new relationship, only to experience the same issues. Maybe it’s a new opportunity to create wealth, but there’s still not enough money in the bank.

But a handful of people manage to create dramatic changes. They escape this cycle and go from rags to riches, from homeless to building million-dollar businesses, from feeling purposeless and confused to living on mission. What makes them different? Why do they break free while so many others stay stuck?

For me, it all came down to one simple distinction. It took me 10 years to discover, but once I did, everything changed. Today, I want to share it with you. It’s a principle so simple that it’s a shame more people don’t understand it. If everyone did, they’d be living the life of their dreams.

Feeling Stuck in My Own Groundhog Day

Not that long ago, I felt completely stuck. I had no money. I had a struggling business. I had two homes in foreclosure. I was single for 10 years, going in and out of bad, short-term relationships. I had no clarity in my life at all.

I literally felt like I was living in the movie Groundhog Day, where Bill Murray wakes up every single day and lives the same day over and over again. In the movie, it’s funny because Bill finds creative ways to deal with it—even trying to escape it through some pretty drastic measures. But in real life, it’s not funny. When it’s your life, feeling stuck can make you feel like there’s no way out.

Over the last 10 years, though, everything changed for me. I’m now doing what I love—running live events, coaching programs, and helping people transform their lives. I’m with the woman of my dreams, who I’ve built this business with. I’m living in my dream home—a 10-bedroom, 12-bath hacienda on top of a mountain in Puerto Rico. I have a son. I have money, clarity, purpose, and spiritual connection.

The question is: What changed? If I look back, there’s one shift I made that transformed everything. It’s a little habit, but it made all the difference.

How Reality Works

Before I share this habit with you, it’s important to understand how reality works. One of my mentors, Terry Cochran, told me something that stuck with me: “What you make matter, matters.”

What she meant was that your thoughts are creating your reality. What you focus on becomes your reality. Human beings are unique because we have the ability to translate vibrations—energy—into physical, material things. Neville Goddard called this creating from the fourth dimension. Just like fish were born to swim and birds were born to fly, human beings were born to create something out of nothing. We’re vibration translators, and what we make matter literally materializes in our lives.

Even your experience of reality is a result of this translation. Your five senses—sight, hearing, touch, taste, smell—are picking up vibrations and translating them into what you perceive as your reality. Albert Einstein said, “Reality is an illusion, albeit a persistent one.” Everything around you is made up of atoms, and those atoms are 99.9999999% empty space. What you’re experiencing is a translation of energy into form.

What Are You Making Matter?

Think about what you focus on daily. Are you making matter what you want? Or are you making matter your problems? Are you paying attention to the absence of money, the absence of love, the pain in your body, the challenges in your business? Or are you focusing on the presence of what you want?

Most of us make the mistake of focusing on the absence of what we want. We notice we don’t have enough money, so we focus on that. We notice the lack of time or the friction in our relationships, so we focus on that. But here’s the tricky part: Your brain is a goal-achieving machine, and it doesn’t know the difference between what you want and what you’re focusing on. Whatever you focus on, it will give you more of.

The Five Primary Drivers

Your beliefs determine your thoughts, which create your emotions, which drive your actions, which produce your results. If you believe money is hard to make, you’ll think thoughts in alignment with that belief. Those thoughts will make you feel anxious or stressed about money. That stress will lead to actions that reinforce scarcity—like avoiding financial opportunities or making poor money decisions. And those actions will produce results that confirm your belief.

The cycle repeats until you change the belief at its core. What you believe creates your reality, and what you make matter, matterfies.

How I Changed My Focus

For years, I focused on what was missing in my life. I wanted more money but focused on my empty bank account. I wanted a soulmate but focused on being single. I wanted clarity but focused on confusion. Then I realized something: To create more of what I wanted, I had to focus on the abundance that already existed in my life.

When I wanted to meet the woman of my dreams, I started by acknowledging the relationships I already had. I had a deeper relationship with myself than ever before. I had a strong connection with my higher power. I had amazing friendships. By focusing on this abundance, I created a relationship frequency that attracted my wife into my life. Within weeks, I met Carol, and everything changed.

The same thing happened with money. I was in financial turmoil—two homes in foreclosure, massive debt, barely any cash in the bank. But I chose to focus on the money I did have. I was grateful for the roof over my head, even if I was behind on payments. I was grateful for the food on my plate, the clothes I wore, the phone I used to run my business. This gratitude created a prosperity frequency, and opportunities to make more money started flowing to me.

The Distinction That Changed Everything

Here’s the simple principle I want to share with you: To have a [blank] you love, love the [blank] you have.

To have a bank account you love, love the one you have. To have a relationship you love, love the relationships you have. To have a business you love, love the business you have.

Most of us treat the present moment as an antagonist. We think we need to escape it to get to where we want to go. But reality doesn’t work that way. You have to transform the present moment into what you desire. When you do, you create a frequency that pulls more of what you want into your life.

Turning Scarcity Into Abundance

There’s a passage in Matthew that says, “To he that hath, even more shall be given, and to he that hath not, even that which he has shall be taken away.” At first, this seemed unfair to me. Why should the person with more get even more, while the person with little loses even that?

But what this scripture is pointing to is frequency. The person with abundance has an abundance mentality, which attracts more abundance. The person with scarcity has a scarcity mentality, which perpetuates scarcity. By finding abundance in your current reality—no matter how small—you align with an abundance frequency that attracts more.

Closing the Gap

So, how do you close the gap between where you are and where you want to be? You start by changing your perception of the present moment. Even if you’re in pain, there’s health in your body. Even if you’re broke, there’s money in your life. Even if you’re lonely, there are relationships you can nurture. Find the evidence of abundance in your current reality and focus on it.

When you do this, you’ll transform your reality. You’ll create a frequency that attracts more of what you want. You’ll stop chasing the future and start pulling it into the present.