Episode 153 – How to Hold a Vision SO BIG It Bends Reality

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Note: This blog post serves as an accompaniment to the corresponding podcast episode of A Changed Mind, where we’ll distill down the core ideas of this week’s theme, along with additional distinctions and insights. If you haven’t listened to the episode yet, you can go here to do so.  Enjoy.

There’s a paradox I wish I had understood much earlier in my life: you don’t create the future you want by hustling harder, grinding longer, or having the perfect plan. You create it by becoming the kind of person who can hold the vision without collapsing under its weight. The size of your dream is only limited by the strength of the container you create within yourself. Most of us are taught to chase, to force, to push—but the real work is about becoming a vessel strong enough to receive. That shift changes everything, because instead of trying to manipulate outcomes, you begin to cultivate capacity.

For years, I thought success was about doing more—more strategy, more effort, more control. I was the person who woke up before dawn, filled every hour with tasks, and wore exhaustion like a badge of honor. And yet, the moments when the biggest breakthroughs arrived in my life weren’t the times I muscled my way through. They came when I was able to hold the vision of what I wanted, to stay steady inside of it, and to let life itself bring resources and opportunities I could never have orchestrated on my own. Those moments taught me that reality bends not to pressure, but to presence. And the more I live into that truth, the more I see how much we miss by confusing effort with power.

The Myth of Hustle Culture

Everywhere we turn, the culture of hustle tells us that success is reserved for those who wake up at 5:00 AM, grind all day, and never stop pushing. I’ve seen it on motivational posters in gyms: “Someone out there is working harder than you. When you meet them, they will beat you.” That’s the creed of hustle culture—run faster, do more, or you’ll be left behind. It sounds noble, but it’s rooted in fear—the fear that if you stop for even a moment, someone else will outpace you. That fear disguises itself as discipline, but it slowly eats away at your health, your peace, and your relationships.

I used to believe that message. I joined the 5:00 AM club. I prided myself on burning the candle at both ends. If I wasn’t working harder than everyone else, I felt like I was falling behind. And for a while, it looked like it worked—I got results. But I also got ulcers, burnout, strained relationships, and a constant hum of anxiety in my body. Hustle worked for short-term outcomes, but it was unsustainable. It eroded my peace. It made life feel like one long emergency. And at the end of it, I often found myself wondering why, despite all the effort, I didn’t feel any closer to joy or freedom. The culture of hustle robs us of the very things we’re chasing, leaving us depleted and disillusioned.

The truth is, hustle culture is the nonsense. The deeper wisdom is that life is always working for our greatest growth and prosperity if we can learn how to hold a vision without collapsing into fear, doubt, or overwhelm. When we let go of the myth that more effort equals more success, we make room for grace, synchronicity, and alignment to do their work. That’s when life begins to feel less like a race and more like a dance.

A Conversation That Changed Everything

Not long ago, I was sharing my vision with a dear friend—a spiritually grounded entrepreneur who has built extraordinary things in the world. I told him about the companies I was launching, my dream of transforming the medical system, the financial system, and creating a regenerative global economy. I spoke of a coalition of awakened people committed to building a new humanity. My words were charged with passion, but underneath was a tremor of fear I hadn’t admitted to myself.

When I finished, he looked at me and asked one simple question: “How does it feel?”

That stopped me in my tracks. Because the truth was, my vision felt exciting, but it also felt heavy. It felt like I was behind schedule. Like I wasn’t doing enough. Like maybe I wasn’t capable of holding something that big. I realized in that moment that I was treating my vision like a burden to carry rather than a reality waiting to unfold. That shift in perspective cracked something open inside of me.

Have you ever felt that way? Maybe your vision isn’t about changing the world—it might be about healing your body, finding love, repairing a relationship, or starting your own business. But the doubt feels the same: if I can’t even manage today’s challenges—unexpected bills, fires at work, the washing machine breaking down—how can I possibly hold a bigger dream? We tell ourselves that because we struggle with the small things, we’re unworthy of the big ones. But the truth is, struggle is part of the training—it’s the resistance that builds our capacity.

That question helped me realize something essential: it’s not my job to achieve the goal. It’s not even my job to know how it will unfold. My job is to hold the vision. When I stopped obsessing over the mechanics and started focusing on my state, everything began to shift. I began to see that clarity and capacity were more important than control.

What It Means to Hold the Vision

So what does it mean to hold a vision? It means becoming the nervous system strong enough to carry the voltage of your dream. It means refusing to collapse into old patterns of stress, doubt, or control. It means trusting that creation itself will flow into the container you’re holding. Holding the vision is about standing steady in the storm and choosing peace even when circumstances suggest panic. It’s about knowing that life is conspiring in your favor, even if you can’t see the evidence yet.

Think of it like strength training. When you lift weights, your muscles fatigue and fail—but over time, with practice, they grow stronger. Holding a vision works the same way. At first, you’ll collapse into fear or overwhelm. But the more you practice, the more resilient your nervous system becomes. Eventually, you can hold bigger and bigger visions without breaking down. That’s how capacity is built—through repeated practice, not perfection.

For me, holding the vision has meant learning to sit with the discomfort of not knowing “how.” It’s meant breathing through the moments when old beliefs screamed at me that I wasn’t enough. It’s meant anchoring into peace even when circumstances gave me every reason to panic. And each time I’ve stayed steady, I’ve noticed something: life rushes in to fill the container I’m holding. Resources appear. Allies show up. Opportunities multiply. It feels almost miraculous, but it’s simply the way creation responds to coherence.

The Two States of Being

Here’s a distinction that has guided me for years: there are only two states of being—primal states and powerful states.

Primal states are stress, anxiety, overwhelm, doubt, anger, depression. They don’t feel good. They’re survival states, ruled by the fight-or-flight nervous system. When you’re here, you’re collapsing into the container. Your vision feels too heavy, too far away, too impossible. And when you live too long in primal states, your body begins to pay the price—illness, fatigue, burnout.

Powerful states are joy, calm, curiosity, excitement, peace, compassion. These are states that feel expansive and alive. They’re powered by the parasympathetic nervous system—the rest-and-digest mode. This is where intuition, health, creativity, and prosperity live. When you’re in a powerful state, you’re holding the container. Your body feels safe, your mind feels open, and your heart feels ready to receive.

I used to think success was about controlling my external world. Now I know it’s about regulating my internal state. The work isn’t to figure out how to make your dream happen. It’s to notice when you’ve collapsed into a primal state, and to shift back into a powerful state. Every time you do this, you grow stronger. Every time you return to peace, you reinforce your ability to hold your vision. This is the real work—moment by moment, state by state.

When Creation Shows Up

The magic happens when you hold the vision long enough for life itself to begin filling the container. I’ll never forget getting on a call with my friend Gordy. I had been worrying about raising money for the companies I wanted to launch, already dreading the grind of pitching and hustling. But when I shared my vision with him, he said, “That’s exactly what I’ve been looking for. Capital is already flowing to me, and I need places to direct it.”

Just like that, the resource I thought I had to struggle for appeared. Not because I had the perfect strategy, but because I was holding the vision and allowing creation to move through it. Gordy’s words reminded me that abundance isn’t something we chase; it’s something we align with. And when we align, what we need finds us.

That story isn’t unique. Over and over, I’ve seen this pattern repeat. When I stay in a powerful state and hold the vision, the right people, resources, and opportunities show up. It doesn’t mean I don’t act—it means my action comes from alignment instead of desperation. And aligned action has a way of multiplying results. What once felt like a mountain becomes a path you’re carried along, step by step.

Five Practices to Strengthen Your Container

So how do you get better at holding the vision? Here are five practices I return to again and again:

1. Do your limiting beliefs work. Every primal state is fueled by a limiting belief—“I’m not good enough,” “There’s never enough money,” “People can’t be trusted.” When you feel yourself collapse, pause and ask: what am I believing right now? Naming and transforming these beliefs is essential. For me, shifting “I’m behind” into “I am right on time” has been life-changing. Beliefs shape reality, and when you swap a disempowering belief for an empowering one, your state follows. 
2. Support your nervous system. A powerful state is a downregulated nervous system. Pay attention to what overstimulates you. For me, giving up caffeine and reducing screen time after dark have been game changers. Cold plunges, sauna, exercise, and breathwork also help. The more I take care of my nervous system, the more capacity I have to hold my vision. When my body feels safe, my mind feels expansive, and my spirit feels clear. 
3. Release compulsive behaviors. Compulsions—whether it’s alcohol, social media, or even overworking—keep the nervous system stuck in stress. Notice what you reach for when you’re uncomfortable. Practice replacing the compulsion with presence. It’s not easy, but every time you do it, you strengthen your container. Over time, the compulsions lose their grip, and presence becomes your default. 
4. Disconnect and be in nature. Nature has its own vibration that restores balance. Unplug from screens, step outside, and let your nervous system sync with the rhythm of the natural world. Even a few hours can reset your state. Some of my best insights have arrived after long walks in the woods or sitting quietly by the ocean. Nature doesn’t rush, and when you immerse yourself in it, you remember that neither do you. 
5. Find community and immerse yourself. We don’t grow in isolation. Surround yourself with others who are practicing these same principles. Read, listen, attend events, and share your vision with people who can hold it with you. I’ve found that being in community accelerates growth in ways I could never manage alone. When others reflect back your vision, it reinforces your own ability to hold it. 

Becoming the Person Who Can Hold It

Your job is not to build your vision—it’s to hold it. When you can stay in a powerful state, refusing to collapse into fear or doubt, you create a container big enough for life to flow resources, opportunities, and miracles into. The bigger the vision, the stronger the container you’ll need—but the process is always the same. It’s not about doing more, it’s about becoming more. It’s about learning to embody the version of you who can stand in faith while the world rearranges itself around your vision.

So let me ask you: what is your big vision right now? What dream feels too heavy, too far away, too impossible? Your job is not to figure it out. Your job is to hold it. To breathe into it. To stay steady as life begins to respond. To trust that even in the absence of evidence, something is moving beneath the surface on your behalf.

Because when you do, you’ll discover something astonishing: creation was always waiting to meet you. And when you hold the vision, reality itself bends to meet it. The impossible becomes possible, not because you hustled harder, but because you became the person who could hold it long enough for it to arrive. And once you learn how to hold it, no vision is too big, no dream is too bold, and no future is beyond reach.